Some of you may have read My tweets and blog post about the fact that I am moving. This move has had Me thinking a lot on stability. However, instead of centering this piece around the current goings-on in My own life, I thought that I would write about My thoughts on stability in a D/s relationship, especially pertaining to financial domination. In essence, I will attempt to share My thoughts on long-term Ownership/slavery and the dynamics that make long-term and possibly life-long servitude possible.
I will begin by saying that it is My personal goal as a Woman and as a Domme to fully own a handful of slaves who will stay with Me for the rest of their lives. The idea of life-long servitude is a wonderful idea to Me for many reasons. I believe that having a slave/slaves who are a constant throughout the entirety of their lives and Mine is wonderful, and a beautiful thing. I believe this to be true because the idea of having even one slave stick with Me throughout the duration of their life, worship Me completely as the radiant, dominant, wonderful, intelligent, creative (I could go on) Woman and Domme that I am is something that is, in essence, priceless. Someone who devotes their life to sacrificing for My benefit, who always puts My needs above theirs, whose every life-decision is one that is calculated based on whether or not it will be a benefit or hindrance to their servitude to Me, and to the benefit of My lifestyle and happiness.
This is but one goal of Mine, and it is one that is not easy. I say this because, as the Dominant in the relationship, every decision is centered around what I want. It is about Me, not the slave. Life is centered around Me as the Domme, as the superior, etc. and this must always be enforced.
I wish that I could speak from more experience. I have kept one slave for a year, and that is the longest that I have owned one, which in My eyes is not a very long time in the scheme of things. However, in that time that slave has watched Me grow as a Domme. That slave has watched Me try new techniques out on it, such as making hypno clips and mp3's, seeing what works and doesn't, it got to witness the very beginning and very first of all of the clips I made, and also was the first to experience My own style of dominating and control. Through owning that slave I learned a lot about how important the building of trust is, and have come out of it with a lot of information that has helped Me in controlling new slaves that seek Me out. For instance, for six months I didn't let the slave have My phone number, even though it was in chastity. I was gone for a while and the slave tried to saw the cage off of itself. This was a big lesson for Me, because now I make sure that none of My chastity slaves are ever put in that kind of situation, and always have access to Me in case of emergencies. However, through everything that has happened, through all of the trial and error, the slave has stuck with Me, and I with it. It has continued to watch Me grow and evolve as a human and as a Domme. Sometimes I've pushed too hard financially, leaving it with no internet and food. Sometimes I didn't know when to push, when to hold back, or when to go further. I wasn't born knowing how to own another person. I wasn't born knowing exactly what to do in every situation - none of us are. Owning a slave in the fullest extent is a full time job, as far as I am concerned - perhaps some would beg to differ with Me. In the end, I have learned a lot from the experience of fully owning a slave, and it is something that I would like to continue on with.
After all of this, the slave has learned to have faith and trust in Me that I know what is best over its own opinions and ideas. And thus, My opinions and idea become the slaves, as it learns and is conditioned to think as I want it to. Even if a few months ago I made a decision that I would not have made now, I still stick by that decision because as the superior, I am always in control and thus responsible for any and all actions that I take.
I think for any sort of long-term ownership to work, there are many things that must take place first. First, I believe that talking to the slave, asking questions, getting to know it, is a very important key to control. When a slave first contacts Me, I normally begin asking questions. When I am satisfied, I ask it if it has any questions for Me, and then sometimes I still keep asking questions. This is because I personally am less interested than the fantasy of domination, and am more interested in actually getting inside of a slave mind and figuring out what is inside. Learning about its experience in the past with domination, why it is the way it is, and a whole array of other information that I would like to know. I think that there is a huge difference between Me as far as on My clips/mp3's and actually having a conversation with Me goes. This is because I have a knack for infiltrating the individuals mind. Some Dommes will argue with Me, but no two subs are the same. Thus, when it comes to mind-fuckery it is difficult to do on an individual level when you are recording a clip that many will be buying. When you are one on one with Me, that's when I really get the chance to do what I am really best at. Perhaps some of the subs who read this still become completely humiliated every time a Domme calls them a "loser" but I doubt this is the case, as over time I feel it probably just becomes another word that they are conditioned to be used to. Therefore, individual insults and humiliations are needed to really hit where it hurts.
This all ties into full ownership because what you are doing is building a relationship. Like with any vanilla relationship, you get to know each other before it gets serious. You get to see whether or not you're compatible, whether or not you like the person, whether or not there is chemistry. I know that I certainly don't have chemistry with each slave that contacts Me. Sometimes I see them sign on and I roll My eyes and go, "ugh, not that annoying freak. If it contacts Me I'm telling it to never speak to Me again." And then there are others who sign on and I think, "I am going to have fun fucking with this one." I also think that Dommes should pick and choose carefully. Always trust your gut instinct. Yes, We are Financial Dommes, but that doesn't mean just because a slave has money that We have to allow it to serve Us. It comes down to the fact that We are always in charge, in control, and We cannot be bought. Ever. We take control, take away power from slaves through the use of various tactics and the extracting of money. Just because a slave has money, does not mean that We should automatically allow it to serve Us. Personally, I'm not a Domme that gets naked. Ever. I don't diss those who do, I just don't believe that a slave should ever have the right to see My body naked. I don't need to allow them to, and if I'm uncomfortable with something then I'm not going to do it and/or allow it. I'm not going to allow a disrespectful, vulgar, wanking asshole to serve ME just because it has money. If it wants to keep clicking My clips/pic sets, sending Me tributes, etc. then that's fine - but that doesn't mean I have to talk to it.
I could go on as this is a very complex subject. However, I will cut this article short by saying that full ownership is a privilege. It is something to be worked hard for, a goal to keep with you as you repeatedly and consistently seek to impress your Domme. It is comparable to wooing a potential mate (to put it in vanilla terms). As the slave, you are a dime a dozen until you step it up. This doesn't just pertain to financial slavery and servitude. There is a vast array of ways that you can serve a Domme, impress Her, and set yourself apart from the rest. And that is what I believe a slave who seeks to be fully owned should do. Set yourself apart from the countless number of slaves who contact Her. Don't pester Her and bug her all the time. Show Her that you are obedient, worthwhile, devoted, and that you have something to offer Her that will benefit Her lifestyle, happiness, and bring some amusement and laughter.
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